Like A Dream

Rapuh

Lately I've been questioning myself.. "Why do I need to face all of these?"

"Orang dah penat bercinta."
"Orang taknak ada apa apa komitmen"
"Orang taknak bercinta dengan sesiapa dah."
"Orang nak hidup bebas"

Those words...
You said em.

But now suddenly...
Haha.
Idk how to say...
Even saying it here hurts me.

Is this what you really want?
A new girl?
Sorok la mcm mana..
I still can know because I know you very well.

The hardest thing to do right now is accepting that you're not the old you anymore.
No, not that maybe.
The fact that your new girl is someone from UNITEN and someone that I respect.

Mudahnya untuk berubah hati.
Sungguh mudah kan..

Pernah tak fikir apa saya rasa bila orang datang dkt saya tanya saya pasal awak dgn dia.. atau datang dkt saya bagitahu yang diorang nampak awak dgn orang baru?

All I can do is redha.
Accept the fact.
Pray for your happiness.

It's time for me to think about my worth.
The value of myself.

Saya cuma kecewa sangat-sangat dimana awak tak pegang pada kata-kata awak.
Tak perlu cakap ayat dkt atas tu kalau diri tu memang dh nak bagi hati dekat perempuan lain.
Thanks awak.

You know what...
Even at this state, I can't hate you.
No matter how disappointed I am.. no matter how hurt it is..
Because..
I accept this as my kifarah.
Kifarah dimana Nina datang dalam hidup awak saat awak ada Aida dulu.. sedangkan Nina boleh bantu awak dengan Aida... instead I took her off from you...
Now orang baru hadir untuk ambil awak instead of dia boleh tolong kita.
I blame myself also for not taking a good care of you.
Up till now.
Yes, call me bodoh or what.. but i just can't hate you.
Orang akan cakap nina bodoh.. tp awak sakitkn nina mcm mana pun.. nina still nampak 1001 kebaikan awak.. :')

Oh Allah..
Berikanlah kekuatan untuk teruskan sisa-sisa hidup ni sampai ke penghujung degree.
Berikanlah aku kekuatan untuk melihat dia pada hari-hari biasa.
Berikanlah aku kekuatan untuk lupakan segalanya.....
Berikanlah aku kekuatan untuk terima takdir ini.. dan redha dengan segalanya...

I dont talk to anyone..
I dont share anymore..
I endure it myself.

Hari-hari kutip cebisan2 hidup yang dh hancur...tp akan ada saat... dia rapuh balik...
tak sempat nk pasang cebisan tu sampai habis...dia keep rapuh je...

I find it unfair.
But I keep pujuk myself..
Nina hati orang kita tkbole paksa...
Its okey...
Let go......
Forget everything.

Semoga air mata yang mengalir tiap2 malam ni...akan berhenti suatu hari nanti...